true self-care

I have been away from real life for a while, trying to figure out how to restructure my life. The most prominent change I need to make is that I need to consider time for unstructured time into my schedule.

I ran across this description, an exact description of what I have been feeling as a pinball for a while now.

Facing life is tough 6.5 out of 7 days. Admitting that it is tough, and needing a break is not a sign of weakness.

"Take your notion that self-care is nothing more than a trip to the spa and chuck it. True self-care means not only placing your physical and emotional needs on your list of things to do, but also using them as a compass for your life. Without self-care, you are a martyr, living from moment to moment. You are bouncing through life like a pinball, sometimes a winner, often a loser. You feel as though life is hurting you, and you don’t feel empowered to make decisions. This can cause you to resent your children and your partner. You resent work when you are there and home when you are there. Your future is bleak, and you may be perpetually tired.
Self-care is the glue that keeps you together. I know a mom who always has a wedding anniversary dinner with her spouse, and who will go for a run by herself, even though she has sick children. Another mom, going through a terrible divorce, turned to her friends for help and graciously received it. When parents are in the weeds with their first baby, they should allow neighbors to cook, clean and bounce the baby, ignoring that inner pride screaming, “No, do it yourself.”

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