songbird

I cannot tell you how much I miss you. 

Supposedly time heals all wounds.

I don't think it is quite so simple.

--if nothing else, it makes me wonder 
what the definition of healed should be.  

It is like what a phantom limb must feel like...

...always present, but just a hair's breadth out of reach.

I love you so much 

and I think of you every single day.

Without fail. 

You have left such a palpable and unequivocal chasm,

a rift that will always keep you close. 

I listen to this every time my heart is too full,

which has been almost every day in the last 2 months. 

maybe because I hate suddenly being older than you,

hate that there are so many missed chances 

to tell you how much I love you,

hate that I cannot call you up 

and tell you about this harmony in that Mahler symphony 

or that I wish I worked out more,

or that I think of you every single time I drive by a waffle house.

I see you in stunning sunsets and crystal clear moonlight,

in landscapes that are too beautiful for words.

It is you and Mozart today, 

hopefully up there, dancing and playing until you heart is so full it could burst.

I love you times a million.

I always will.

(song starts at 1:30)

jorolen kononi kan ye tu la, jorolen, kononin miiri yorojan

The worried songbird cries out in the forest, her thoughts go far away

Ni fa te maa min na, ni fa t’i la, fako miirila

For those who have no father, her thoughts go out to them.

Oumou Sangare and Bela Fleck

Bambara language